The Gas Stove Has Been Fashioned Into Another Icon of Conservative Worship

The House drew up a bill to prevent something that was never going to happen, because that's the way Republicans roll these days

Ah, the children were at play again in the House of Representatives. There was weeping and wailing and the air was full of juiceboxes and snickerdoodles, and everybody needed to go to their mats for quiet time. Let us set the scene. The House was preparing to pass a bill protecting the right of every American to own a gas stove. This is what we call Gohmert Class legislation. Nobody is talking about banning gas stoves, much less ripping them out of American kitchens. This whole thing started when a member of the Consumer Product Safety Commission mentioned that the CPSC might considering regulating gas stoves in new constructions. This immediately got fed into the Phony Outrage Smelter and the gas stove was fashioned into an icon of conservative worship, right up there with red meat and the AR-15.

So the House got busy and drew up a bill to prevent something that was never going to happen, because that's the way Republicans roll these days. It looked like it might sail through the House. But its sponsors, and Speaker Kevin McCarthy, had not reckoned with the Freedom Caucus and the tantrum had been building within it since McCarthy declined to help them decimate the American economy, that RINO bastid. From Politico:

Pause for a moment to remember that the message was sent by blocking a bill aimed at preventing something that...is...never...going...to...happen.

I happen to have a gas stove myself. Watching the House of Representatives at work makes me want to stick my head in it.

Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976. He lives near Boston and has three children.

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